Friday, June 26, 2009

St. Petersburg, Florida

Florida has a lot to answer for. Nascar. Real estate swindles. The 2000 elections. Even if you balance that against Jimmy Buffet music, fresh citrus products and Poodle-eating Alligators, the state would do well to be mindful of a righteous God's wrath.

Even with killer hurricanes and a collapsed housing bubble, it still feels like they're getting off easy.

I spend hours driving between two endless walls of identical strip malls. Can there possibly be enough people to buy all the useless junk, eat all the crappy food and hire all the shyster lawyers from billboards along the local highways? Judging from the number of vacant storefronts and foreclosed shops, perhaps not.

The landscape is one vast, unbroken plain, showing the same weary succession; swamp drained, citrus grove abandoned, housing and retail development thrown up and sold at extortionate profit, post-bubble slow decay. Everything was built with one eye on the next hurricane that will surely take it all out to sea. Why knock yourself out?

Heat shimmers off the pavement and thunderheads boil. Even the black buzzards look defeated as they pick over some over-ripe scrap of road kill.

For lack of a better plan, I head for the beach. Crossing a scalding quarter mile of blinding white sand, I stand looking out at the sea. I know it's too early for hurricanes, but I stare out anyway, watchful for any sign of the coming storm.

6 comments:

Daniel Cormier said...

Welcome to my neck of the woods.

Paul Souders said...

Thanks Daniel. I hope I didn't hurt anyone's feelings...

Chuck said...

Sadly, I think you summed up Florida pretty well...

Daniel Cormier said...

Nah. Didn't hurt my feelings, anyway.

MG said...

Aww. Florida. My home. For every accurate description, like the one you've made here, there is a counterpart. There are parts of the state that are still beautiful in their own right. Parts that greedy bastards haven't gotten their hands on yet. I feel like the movement to protect Old Florida has grown over the last 15 years - but we need more supporters. The entire state isn't this way!

Paul Souders said...

Thanks for your thoughtful input MG. I'm glad to hear that good parts of the state survive. And one of these days I hope to actually see them. Thanks for not taking offense at my ham-fisted lampoon.